False Profit's Tuesday Night Party

Date and Time:
Tuesday, September 1st, 2015, 8:30 PM – 8:30 AM
Located at Art:


False Profit, Inc., sent shock waves through the stock market with its recent announcement of current plans for its annual Tuesday Night Party (TNP) at The Burning Man Arts and Culture Festival. In a move outside experts are hailing for its boldness and freshtasticness, False Profit, Inc., released news that it would be holding the event not at its desert research field campus proper, but “out in the open.”

“For 14 years, we’ve invited shareholders to our desert campus to celebrate with us,” said Jef Pearlman, Senior VP of Auditory Logistics. “This year, we decided to think ‘outside the camp.’”

Citing ever-increasing attendance, bicycle parking challenges, and the desire for attendees to experience high fidelity sound “en plein air” as forces pushing the party into the open playa, , a spokesperson for the company enthusiastically predicted that this year’s TNP would be “the best evar.”

Referring to the unanticipated relocation, an unnamed insider also hinted that the main research facility is so filled this year with mad science projects--which shareholders will undoubtedly wish to keep a watchful eye on as conditions evolve--that the decision to shift was “easy peasy”.

The party will be held on the open “playa” approximately 300 feet out from the company’s primary campus location of 5:15 and Esplanade. This location was chosen due to the giant deep sea fish that will be located there, which analysts expect will protect attendees from wandering shirtcockers, newbs, darkwads, those rich people who are destroying Burning Man, and other unsavory characters. Known as Illumacanth, the fish will delight and astound party attendees with its spikes, lights, and fire. Sound for the event will be provided by the legendary Dr. Brainlove, a project of The Phage, a long-time affiliate company and co-conspirator of False Profit.